This is what happens #1

My roommate and I have conversations while I'm at work. Usually they're in all caps. Usually they're something like this.

AIM IM with GREGORIO.
4/14/08, 9:53 AM

him:
I ATE THE PIGEON THAT GOT THE DISEASE FROM THE CAR IN THE SKY
me:
YOUR CHOCOLATE IS ACTUALLY MADE OF CHICKEN LIP SHARD MEAT
him:
9/11 WAS A CONPIRACY BY THE MORMONS AND CHAPSTICK COMPANIES TO LOWER PRODUCTION COSTS OF SPECIAL UNDERWEAR AND BOOKS OF MORMON WITH CHAPSTICK IN THEM
him:
HORRIFIC PIE TASTING CONTEST ACCIDENT KILLS 6,000
me:
LEPER COLONY LIMBO CONTEST ENDS IN CONFUSION, GLEE
me:
ELEPHANT-FLAVORED BUNGALOWS OFFER SICK CHILDREN CHANCE TO HUSTLE & BUSTLE ONE LAST TIME
him:
SUPERMAN SAVES SELF FROM ADDICTION TO ROAST BEEF
me:
ROBOT LAMB FIGHTING BREAKS OUT IN EAST NETHERLANDS
me:
TACO FLAVOR TO CHANGE THE FACE OF FANTASY BASEBALL FOREVER
him:
JESSE JACKSON FLIES TO EUROPE ON A GIANT DIAPER, EATS EAGLE
him:
THEN WRITES SONG CALLED 'THAT WAS MY YUM YUM BIRD'
me:
JAMES VAN DER BEEK TRIUMPHANT RETURN TO SILVER SCREEN AS GAY MAN'S LEG
him:
JAUNDICE PRAISED AS 'WORLD'S GREATEST DISEASE', MICROSCOPIC VIRUS ACCEPTS PLAQUE, MIGHT BE CRUSHED BY PLAQUE
me:
GOD CHANGES MIND, ABORTS WORLD, SPIKES FOOTBALL LIKE GOOD AMERICAN